Author: jgmcquarrie

Today’s Recipe Knives Out

Ingredients Well, it’s a dish prepared as a twisty-turny whodunnit, perhaps less directly indebted to the style of those late 19th- and early 20th-century mystery suppliers like Agatha Christie, but reflecting more contemporary approaches, specifically of films like Clue. Of course second-hand influence is still influence, and the familiar ingredients are all here – the outrageously silly name (and accent!) of Daniel Craig’s Benoit Blanc recalls the many, many idiotic accents of Poirot across the years and gives a flavour of the original without the need for direct references. He’s been called in by a mysterious figure to investigate the death of author Harlan Thrombey (a suitably ripe Christopher Plummer), who apparently died by his own hand. As his family gather for the reading of the will there is suspicion of foul play, and of course everyone in the family ends up wanting their fingers in the pie – Harlan’s vast fortune – and of course everyone has a reason and motive to get it. Could it be the good-looking rake of a grandson played by cast-against-type Chris Evans, Hugh? (America’s Asshole!)

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What’s The Movie? The Good Liar

What’s It All About, JG? Roy (Ian McKellen) is an ageing con-man, who alongside his business partner Vincent bilks gullible/vulnerable investors out of money for reasons which on Roy’s behalf appear to be little more than “because he enjoys it”. He comes into the orbit of Betty (Helen Mirren) via an on-line dating site and he prepares to run the sting once more having discovered that Betty is both widowed and really rather well off. He gradually inveigles his way into her life and eventually her house, despite the clear disapproval of Betty’s grandson, Steven (Russell Tovey, turning up to do That Thing Russell Tovey Does).

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What’s The Movie? Terminator: Dark Fate

What’s It All About, JG? Trying to restore even the faintest scrap of credibility to the Terminator franchise, mostly. Ignoring – with some justification – everything after the iconic Terminator 2: Judgement Day, Dark Fate picks up the story some years later. John Connor is eventually – and speedily – taken out by a Terminator and Sarah goes into hiding. Meanwhile in Mexico we have a whole new Terminator, the Rev-9, who’s hot on the heels of The New Sarah Connor ™, Dani. She’s being protected by an augmented human from the future, the not-at-all-with-an-on-the-nose-name Grace, who was sent back in time to protect her (sound familiar?).

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What’s The Movie? Joker

What’s It All About, JG? Oh good, an origin story! We certainly don’t have enough of them littering the place! But rather than the usual heavy-handed here’s-how-character-X-became-a-superhero we instead have a heavy-handed here’s-how-character-X-became-a-supervillain. Yes, it’s the origin story of the Joker, Batman’s nemesis and a story which bears no resemblance to any other Joker origin story portrayed on screen (not that there’s anything wrong with that). This time we follow the life of Arthur Fleck, a sad-sack rent-a-clown with an obsession over a TV talk show and some pretty severe mental health issues, but with an unfulfilled desire to be a stand-up comic. After a series of humiliations at work lead to him getting fired (after taking a gun to a children’s ward) Arthur ends up killing three Wall Street-type bozos on a train, two in self-defence and one simply as an execution.

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What’s The Movie? Godzilla: King Of The Monsters

What’s It All About, JG?  Well, it’s a Godzilla movie in which Godzilla fights lots of other monsters that aren’t Godzilla but are roughly the same size and/or weight and/or power level as Godzilla so we get lots and lots of juicy monster action. Turns out there’s a whole bunch of kaiju/monsters (delete depending on pretentiousness level) buried under the Earth and the allegedly-mysterious Monarch organisation has been tracking them. An eco-terrorist group wants to free them so they can reclaim the Earth that humanity has destroyed, so that means lots of big slap-fights between various Toho properties as Charles Dance rushes about the place setting them all free (I mean, I’m sure his character has a name, but come on. It’s Charles Dance). Dr Emma Russell has built a device that can calm the beasts and has been working on it with her daughter Madison (Stranger Things‘s Millie Bobby Brown) while her estranged husband, Mark, firstly tries to kill ‘Zilla then eventually comes to realise that the world needs him to save them from the other kaiju. It all ends in a big punch-up that flattens Boston and ‘Zilla roaring his dominance over all monsters as they bend the knee.

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What’s The Movie? Avengers: Endgame

What’s It All About, JG? Saying an emotional, tear-jerking farewell to characters we’ve lived, loved and explored with over more than twenty movies and giving them a rousing send-off as one of the most ambitious projects in all of cinema closes out. Or, corporate synergy, crossover promotions, blatant emotional manipulation and a pathological desire to keep the superhero gravy train going. Take your pick, really. Either way the story is simple – Thanos wiped out half of all life in the universe by snapping his fingers, so now whatever remains of the Avengers has to find a way to stop him, using a really weird model of time travel, sacrifices, and loopy plot logistics. Steed and Mrs Peel not featured.

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