Star Trek: Discovery – Season 5

Star Trek: Discovey bows out with a fifth, final, season. But can it manage a late-in-the-day turnaround?

What’s the Show? Star Trek: Discovery and it’s fifth and final season.

What’s It All About, JG? Well, it’s a quest, innit? The crew of the Discovery are sent on a “red directive” to investigate a Romulan science vessel from 800 years in the past, where they chance upon two couriers, Moll and L’ak, who find a journal. This relates to the Progenitors tech from the TNG episode “The Chase”. The journal provides clues and whoever can track down all of them gets the technology they used. This is, of course, awesomely powerful. Book gets roped back in because he’s on the show, the Breen get involved as the Big Bad and want to use it as a weapon, and the Federation want it to stop it being misused and also cuz they’re da best. The rest of the season is a runaround to establish who will get all the bits and thus the tech. After a lot of episodes of “find the thing”, Michael Burnham (who else?) manages to secure the tech but decides nobody should have it so casts it away. Then Saru gets married. Then we get a flash-forward to Burnam and Book being married with a son, and Burnam taking the Discovery to a new location and leaving it there for a long time to away a new red directive.

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Doctor Who Season 14, Episode 7 – “The Legend of Ruby Sunday” / Episode 8 “Empire of Death”

After a wobbly season, can Russell T Davies manage to at least stick the landing?

What’s The Episode? The two-part season finale The Legend of Ruby Sunday and Empire of Death.

What’s It All About, JG? The Doctor returns to UNIT and meets up with Kate Lethbridge-Stewart (Jenna Redgrave), Mel (Our Bonnie), and assorted other UNIT bods. Kate wants help finding out who the mysterious Susan Triad, head of S Triad Technology, is – someone the Doctor and Ruby have been encountering in various different forms on their travels together. Mel’s undercover and investigating and while she does that, Mrs Flood (Anita Dobson) pops into take over caring for Cherry while Ruby’s Mum Carla (Michelle Greenidge) joins the shenanigans at UNIT. Turns out they have a Time Window, a device that lets them look back in time and they use a VHS of the night of Ruby’s abandonment to try and figure out who her biological Mum is. This overloads the Time Window, taking a UNIT Colonel with it. Susan (Not That One, despite the play) prepares to give a speech to the UN but before she can, a UNIT employee – the perfetctly-dreadfully named Harriet Arbinger – announces that The One Who Waits has in fact stop waiting and it’s Sutekh, who turns up for a nice end-of-episode reveal. Which is nice.

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Doctor Who Season 14, Episode 6 – “Rogue”

Time for a historical romp! But can the Doctor’s romance right a struggling season?

What’s The Episode? Rogue

What’s It All About, JG? The Doctor and Ruby travel back to Regency England where they say the word “Bridgerton” a lot, in case the audience don’t get it. There they encounter mysterious bounty-hunter Rogue (Jonathan Groff) who is there to… er, stop the Chulder? They’re shape-shifting aliens who enjoy cosplaying but also suddenly decide they want to destroy the world for a bit of added jeopardy. The Doctor and Rogue have a bit of a romance while Ruby largely gets lost in a typical love-plot of the era. Eventually (very eventually) the Chulda are defeated, the world is saved, Rogue sacrifices himself to save Ruby, and that’s pretty much that.

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Doctor Who Season 14, Episode 5 – “Dot And Bubble”

Can the fifth episode of the season manage to land its satire? Is it satire?

What’s the Episode? Dot and Bubble

What’s It All About, JG? Lindy Pepper-Bean, an insufferable rich brat, is a resident of the town (?) of Finetime, a chintzy, dayglo residence where she lives within a literal bubble of social media and friends, projected round her by a floating “dot”. First Ruby, then the Doctor, try to break into her feed because the residents are slowly (very slowly, actually) being eaten by slug-like creatures. Lindy, unable to even walk in a straight line without guidance from her dot, manages to escape her place of work with the Doctor and Ruby’s help and encounters Ricky, a vacuous singer who turns out to actually be fairly smart underneath it all. They’re directed to the basement by the Doctor to try and escape. While trying to open a door to let them out into the Wild Woods beyond, the Doctor realises the dot is responsible for all the deaths and it turns violent and tries to kill Lindy. She sacrifices Ricky so she can escape, then finally meets the Doctor and Ruby in real life, where other members of the Finetime community are waiting. But rather than allow the Doctor to rescue them, they sail off into the Wild Woods, presumably to die terrible deaths, while the Doctor rages against his inability to save them.

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Season 14, Episode 4 – 73 Yards

Third time was the charm for this season but can the fourth episode keep up the winning streak?

What’s It All About, JG? Good question. The Doctor steps on a fairy circle after exiting the TARDIS and vanishes. Ruby then spends the rest of the episode haunted by a figure she can’t quite focus on that stays the titular 73 yards away. And whenever anyone encounters the out-of-focus figure, they treat Ruby with contempt and turn away from her, whether random figures in a village, family members, or UNIT. This haunts Ruby throughout her life until she figures out how to use this “power” and takes down a fascist UK prime minister who wants to use a nuke just coz. Eventually, on Ruby’s deathbed, the mysterious figure is revealed to be Ruby herself, smeared across her own timeline. She can then go back in time and is able to stop the Doctor from breaking the charm and it’s all over. Erm. Something like that, anyway…

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Season 14, Episode 3 – Boom

Stephen Moffat returns to the world of Doctor Who. But has he managed a classic or will it blow up in his face?

What’s the Episode? Boom

What’s It All About? The Doctor and Ruby visit a war-torn planet where the Doctor accidentally stands on a land mine then spends the next forty-five minutes trying not to do that. That’s pretty much it. Oh, there’s a war on, and people are reduced to flesh tubes when they die, and ambulances that assess whether it’s worth spending money keeping you alive, and a Dad’s love for his child saves the day, and Ruby is shot (but gets better) and plenty more besides but that’s what it comes down to. The Doctor. On a mine. For an episode.

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Season 14 (look, that’s what I’m going with), Episode 2 – “The Devil’s Chord”

Can the second episode of the season improve things from the first? Ehh…

What’s The Episode? “The Devil’s Chord”

What’s It All About, JG? The Doctor and Ruby travel back in time to watch the Beatles record their first album, only to discover that they’re crap. Turns out music has been stolen by one of the Pantheon, Maestro, who is the child of the Toymaker. Maestro manifests as a drag queen / panto dame who jumps out of painos and wants to end all music so that… um… music plays itself or something. It’s a bit vague. Never mind though, because the Doctor and Ruby take on Mastero, which involves a lot of running around and then a music battle which they lose. Just when it looks like they’re done for, Lennon and McCartney play the magic chord that banishes Maestro who, just before departing, ponderously tells us that “The One Who Waits” is, er, waiting and the day is saved in time for a musical number to end the episode with, “There’s Always A Twist At The End”.

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Doctor Who – Season… Uh, Fourteen? Forty? One? Did the Jodie/David Specials Count As A Season? Maybe? Something. Anyway, Episode 1 – “Space Babies”

Ncuti Gatwa’s first season gets underway. But can this Doctor get a decent launch now Christmas has been and gone?

What’s The Episode? “Space Babies”.

What’s It All About, JG? Babies. In Space. You can’t say the title doesn’t give you the information you need. The Doctor and Ruby land on a space station and are immediately chased by a monster. Escaping in a lift, they discover the entire station is run by babies, having been abandoned by people so pro-life they’d rather let the babies die a horrible death than turn off the machine that makes them (in a baby farm, of all things). The Doctor and Ruby faff about a bit before discovering that the computer looking after the babies, Nan-E, is actually a person called Jocelyn who couldn’t bear the idea of abandoning the babies and stayed behind to protect them. After trying to eject the creature into space, they realise that it’s a) made of snot (a literal bogeyman) and b) the only one of its kind so the Doctor gets to do all that Last of the Time Lords stuff we left a good fifteen years ago. Great. (Not that he is the Last Of The Time Lords. Actually, he’s the first, but let’s not get into that right now.) Anyway, the snot monster is saved, the babies are rescued by letting off a massive fart and all’s well that ends well.

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Doctor Who – The Church on Ruby Road

The 15th Doctor gets his first full episode and his first Christmas special but how does it go for the new Doctor?

What’s the Show? The first Gatwa-starring Doctor Who, the first Christmas special in quite a few years, and the last of the 60th anniversary specials.

What’s It All About, JG? A baby is left at a church door on Christmas Eve, who turns out to be Our Companion, Ruby Sunday (Millie Gibson), who’s fostered to a loving mum and associated family but has been having a string of bad luck. The bad luck is because some goblins – no further explanation given – have been picking on her. They feed on coincidence and accident – no further explanation given – and abduct a newly-fostered baby, Lulubelle. The Doctor (Ncuti Gatwa) turns up and is taken on board the goblin ship with Ruby to try and rescue Lulubelle with the help of some overly-explained intelligent gloves. There is then a song-and-dance number while the Doctor rescues Lulubelle from being eaten by the Goblin King. Meanwhile, David Bowie turns in his grave. The goblins go back in time and snatch Ruby as a baby, turning her foster mum from a loving parent into a cold, hard woman. The Doctor realises the goblins have gone back in time so follows them in the TARDIS and pulls their ship down on to the church spire, defeating them and fixing the flow of time. Returning to the present, the Doctor sees that everything is back the way it should and Ruby, having worked out the Doctor is a time-traveller, joins him in the TARDIS. And then the neighbour, Mrs Flood, interrupts the credits to ask directly to camera if we’ve never seen a TARDIS before.

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Doctor Who – The Giggle

The third and final Doctor Who Tennant special sees the Doctor face the Toymaker. Are we game for that?

What’s the Show? The final 2023 Doctor Who special.

What’s It All About, JG? In the prelude, John Logie Baird’s assistant buys a dummy from the mysterious Toymaker, who’s a bit of a racist prick. The dummy is used by Baird in a test transmission… what could go wrong?

The Doctor and Donna are back on Earth where everything has fallen apart because some mysterious force – you know, the one in the pre-credits sequence – has made everyone believe that they are right all the time. The Doctor and Donna hook up with UNIT who are trying to contain the situation, with limited effect. Mel (Mel!) is also at UNIT for… reasons, helping out. The Doctor and Donna travel back to 1925 to find the Toymaker, who first taunts the Doctor about the fate of his previous companions and then leads him on a merry chase around an ever-shifting series of corridors. The Doctor loses a game of cards to him but survives using the “best of three” rule. Ahem.

Once they escape, they high-tail it back to UNIT HQ where – following a dance sequence – the Toymaker eventually shoots the Doctor. This triggers a so-called “bi-generation” whereby David Tennant and Ncuti Gatwa can share some screen time. The Doctor(s) defeat the Toymaker in a game of catch, then the David Tennant 14th Doctor heads off to have a nice life (it says here) with Donna and her extended family while the 15th Doctor heads off to have adventures of his own.

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